Deadly Appliances
by saku642734
Summary: Our loveable wizard goes about his daily routine of mastering the art of muggle appliances. (Written for round 7 of the Quidditch League FanFiction Competition)


**This story is based on Harry Potter written by J.K Rowling**

 **A/N: This story is written for the Quidditch League Fanfiction Competition. It takes place in a AU.**

 **Round 7- Muggle Me This**

 **Seeker- Write about a Pureblood witch or wizard marrying a Muggle and learning how to use everyday Muggle technology like toasters, telephones or TVs.**

I wake up and do my morning stretches. I look over to the other side of the bed, only to find it empty.

I groan into my hands. Oh, not this again. Everytime I sleep in late, I wake up to find Felicity already gone for work.

I really need to start waking up when she does. My mornings are a disaster without her.

I get up to start my day reluctantly. I might as well get started.

I select some clothes from my wardrobe, laying them out on the bed. I can usually handle the shower, it's similar enough to a wizard's bath with the same kind of nobs. Sometimes, I forget about needing to wait for warm water, nothing serious.

This time, I take care not to forget. I stick my fingers in first instead of trusting that the temperature is fine to just jump in. The first time I made that mistake I was sure I froze half of my body.

After my quick shower, I continue with the rest of my routine. Next on the list is breakfast.

The first time I tried to use the stove unsupervised I nearly singed off my hair. Now I have graduated to only getting a few burns, an improvement in my opinion.

Still, let's not tempt fate this morning. It's already going steady and I would rather not have any burns to treat today.

I head to the kitchen and check the fridge. Bacon and eggs are out due to the stove, and frozen breakfasts are not possible. There is no way I will ever be able to use what she calls a Microwave. Besides the complicated buttons, I would rather not make my food by "nuking it" as she puts it. It doesn't sound safe.

So the only option I can see right now is toast. After a month of practicing I'm sure I'll get it this time.

I select slices of bread from the bag and stick them in the toaster. The sides, I learned, can burn you as easily as the stove. So I steer clear of it until the toaster finishes. I press the button downwards and wait.

My mind wonders and around five minutes later I hear a shrill ding that makes me jump every time. Even if I'm paying attention.

The toast is completely black and I groan in defeat. Burnt toast again then. Once I spread a generous amount of butter on it I'm sure it will taste fine. I'll probably add some marmalade on it, too, just in case.

I reach over to pull the toast out, using my fingers. As soon as I pull them out my fingers start to burn. I quickly run over to the nearest counter and dropped the slices. My finger tips are red and I put a few in my mouth to sooth them. So much for not getting burns. They're fine after a few seconds so I proceed to butter my toast. Finished, I walk into the living room.

Now, the ultimate test, let's see if my practice from the last month has been for nothing. Every time I try, I can never turn on what Felicity calls the Telly. I have some time before work so every morning I try until it's time to go.

I sit down and pick up the remote. I then proceed to press every single button in rapid succession. Nothing happens. I try this for another five minutes before getting up to play with the buttons on the telly.

It doesn't matter which ones I press, nothing works. Around thirty minutes later, I give up and head to work through the floo.

I really hope I can master this soon. Felicity and I got engaged a month ago and I want to be able to cook or do something by the time we get married. When we moved in together the only thing she wanted was for us to use Muggle appliances, saying magic made me lazy. The only thing I wanted was to connect our fireplace to the Floo Network. We agreed and now I have to learn all of these things.

It was a fair trade but it is still hard to try and figure everything out.

I work through the day, and am finally able to Floo home sometime in the evening. As soon as I step through I smell the wonderful aroma of her cooking. Every day is lovely as long as it ends like this.

I walk into the kitchen after cleaning the ash off my robes, gaining her attention.

She puts what looks like a casserole into the oven and turns around to greet me. "You're home!" she puts her gloves down and gives me a hug. "Did work go well? And how was your morning?"

I let out a sigh of relief and bask in the relaxation she brings me. "Work went well, we were working with Venomous Tentacula today and no one got nicked this time." I quickly glance around the kitchen. "My morning went better than usual, the toaster and the telly being the only things that gave me any issues."

Her embrace tightens and she starts rubbing my back. "You'll get it eventually. Besides we Muggles are raised learning how to use all of these things, and some still can't use them properly when they are older. For only using them a short amount of time, you are doing remarkably well."

I smile and kiss her on the forehead. "I think I can figure the toaster out on my own, but I will never figure out how to use the telly without you."

She hums absently. "Good idea, let's go figure out what's wrong." she pulls me towards the living room and sits me down on the sofa. After inspecting the front for a moment, and trying a few buttons on the remote without success, she stops to think. A moment later she suddenly slaps herself in the forehead. "How did I not think of it? I am so stupid. That is always the first thing you're supposed to check."

Walking around the telly she inspects it and cries out in triumph. I cannot help but ask, "What is it?"

She starts to explain. "Do you remember when I was telling you about how the telly works because it gets power from being plugged in? Well it has been unplugged this whole time, that's why it wasn't working!" She shakes her head at me. "See what I mean? Even I didn't notice it for a long time, and it's supposed to be the first thing you check."

I guess that made me feel slightly better, even Muggles had trouble with their own stuff. Maybe I really will be able to figure it out soon. I was never the smartest but I was no slouch either.

Felicity pulls me up and towards the kitchen. "Come on Neville, I was just finishing up making dinner, we're having mashed potatoes, green bean casserole, and sausage."

"Oh, my favorites." I assist her in any way I can, even knowing I am no help at all. Once we are sitting down and enjoying the food, I bask in the contentment I feel.

I Neville Longbottom, will soon be married to Felicity Adamson.

I am the happiest man alive.

For the record, ever since the telly incident, I always check to make sure everything is plugged in.


End file.
